Told myself I was okay
But now it’s too late in the day
To espouse such nonsense
When I know in my heart of hearts
I don’t want any of these things
Nothing. Not even the guitars
Or the TV.
I don’t want the music playing
In my ears
I just have it on for noise.
I don’t want any of this
I’m tired of life again. Or I’m tired of me. I feel a darkness surround me. Enveloping me. I don’t actively want to die, I just have a sense of hoping I might. It’s not the world is bad and people are bad or other such nonsense. It’s that I’m painfully indifferent to life. I don’t care if the sun is shining, or if something is just ‘wonderful’ I don’t care if it’s shit, or who is evil or who is not evil. I just don’t care because life is just a bleak blanket of useless nothing.