A Rambling Book Review: Stephen King as Richard Bachman, The Long Walk

A small amount of spoilers for anyone who wishes to read the book or watch the new film. You have been warned.

I have read this before, and it’s one of those books I always remembered, so I decided to reread it. It started with me thinking that maybe I had misremembered how good it was. I wasn’t quite geling with it like I had remembered, but I persevered through the first few chapters, and I was drawn in again. It’s somehow very readable, even as it disturbs somewhat.

The Long Walk seems to be a metaphor for life, how we each fear death to varying degrees, and we hear and see other people have died, yet we have to continue with life regardless. Despite seeing and hearing of those around us who have died through the years, a lot of us spend time with the intellectual knowledge that we will one day die, yet emotionally, we often don’t quite believe it. It’s a weird cognitive dissonance I’ve observed in myself and others. This whole story seems to be an exercise in that fight inside our heads, that fear and panic at the knowledge of our death and how often to defeat that fear and panic, we bumble along and emotionally soothe ourselves.

This was readily observable in 2020 during the height of the pandemic. While people were dying, there were discussions on TV shows and YouTube videos about how the people most at risk were those with ‘underlying health issues. ‘ People would say things like, ‘I’m not too worried about Covid because I’m healthy.’ People said this a lot, and I kept thinking to myself, ‘I guess if they repeat it, they feel better about the uncertainty.’ People spoke of this with an element of pride in their supposed health status, but underneath it, as callous as it appeared, they were soothing themselves, because it could potentially be them, and deep down, I think a lot of them knew it.
Every time the new death count came on the news, people all consoled themselves that they hadn’t caught it yet, or they caught it and it felt like a common cold! Then you have the other people who got on a train from conspiracy station, anything to make their potential death a more controllable outcome. If it’s a conspiracy, then this virus isn’t real; actually, the whole thing was planned. Things are easier if everything is controllable by human hands. Even if controlled by evil humans, at least it was humans, and if evil humans had control, then good humans could regain control. If the virus isn’t real, then those invisible things that can make us feel bad, or cause chronic illness or indeed kill us, aren’t real.

I’ve had conversations before with people, talking about someone who has just died, and the person will say something like, ‘Well, he did have heart issues.’ Yeah, he may well have, but that doesn’t mean death won’t find you, too.

The character Stebbins seemed to be doing just fine, no warnings, not till the end, yet he didn’t win, did he?

Olson continued for a long time, despite appearing like the dead walking; some of the seemingly fittest walkers got their ticket not because of a physical setback, but because they went crazy.

That’s another thing life does to you: it can drive you crazy, and if it doesn’t drive you crazy, you may well have been born crazy so that you wouldn’t know the difference.

Then you had the crowd congealing into one mass face of the monster created by the Frankenstein-esque mediascape that promoted such a bloody dystopian idea, and how they felt joy and cheered on the bloody deaths.

Seems familiar. There is something in the human psyche that, when congealed together as one mass, they become monstrous entities controlled no longer by individuals but by a baser surge of bloodlust.

I enjoyed reading this book; Stephen King is a very hit-or-miss author with me. This is one of the hits.

…And

outside covered itself in our intentions
or lack thereof
It’s hard to be sure
but death laid itself bare
the truest of all deaths
for life did not stir
Not from last year’s seed
nor the loins of death itself

…..And it was true
there was nothing wild left
but for the action of fucking

Mr yellow sun

Fuck your horizon
this teacled air I breathe and eat
The sun only makes it heavier
I hate that ball of fire
there he is
Mr yellow sun
fucking shining
while I watch you dying!
I know it’s a self centred thought
to think the universe should tremble
for you and my breaking heart
but fuck, I cannot fathom
the worlds indifference
and how that fucking sun
shines on him
all while the light goes out of him
It feels as though you, you Mr yellow fucking sun
stole it
with your fucking heat bearing down on us
I hate your promise of such light
after winters afflictions!
But he falls now!
He falls now! While you rise!
And it all goes back to that feeling
where I want to shoot you
you fucking cunt
I hate you, Mr yellow sun
I hate you, Mr yellow cunt!

I’ll let go too.

Everything feels tangled up
a mess of messes
I need some good news
in amongst this cover of darkness
because I’m starting to wonder
if it’s worth continuing through
I’ll stick around
not because I’m strong
but because I’m too weak to let go
and I won’t leave him behind
but when he lets go of his last breath
I feel assured
I’ll let go too.

In the blaze thirst can’t be quenched

It was a hollow cry, for no one could ease the pain. She howled into the night, and he bellowed from the other side.
The crescent of the moon was spangled through the bare branches of the trees; winter had come too soon, that was what Blaze believed, but Willow said this was the way of things now.
Life was becoming death in an endless winter.
Blaze had asked Willow if she couldn’t try putting a more optimistic spin on things, but Willow said she lived truthfully; an optimistic spin would be a lie.

‘Are we to blame?’ Blaze had asked Willow.
Willow slumped down against the rotting trunk of a willow tree, ‘No.’ Willow said.
And Blaze could only believe her because she wouldn’t sugarcoat the truth.
‘Is it anyone’s fault?’
Willow looked around at the cracked earth beneath her feet; the sun was ablaze in the sky, but winter’s soul had shrouded the earth with only shadows of ghosts. And so no matter how much that sun provided its heat, the mass extinction had done its thing. And yes, one day, maybe, life would find its way again, but for now, all that was left was the debris of homosapiens.
Plastic yoghurt pots rolled across the barren land like tumbleweeds, plastic wrapped tightly around the bones of some long-lost animal suffocated from the very plastic that now waved in the wind.

‘I have found you,’ Blaze had told Willow as he held her against the stump of the tree, ‘and so you have found me.’
Willow had smiled sadly up into his broken stare. The lights of his eyes had long gone out, as had her own.
‘Let’s let ourselves go,’ Willow said softly to him, ‘together.’
‘But I thirst for life.’ Blaze had protested.
‘We will thirst forever.’ Willow’s neck creaked as she lowered her eyes.
Blaze held her tighter in his arms, ‘The sun gives us life; we are living.’
‘This is not living, Blaze.’
Willow loosened herself from his arms, ‘Take out my solar panel.’ Her neck creaked as she craned it to look back at Blaze.
‘I…I can’t.’ Blaze said.
‘You can.’
Blaze began to whir, his head shook, ‘No! No! No! No!’ His left eye drooped, and a shard of loose glass dropped onto the cracked earth.

Since that day, a gulf had separated them. Blaze wandered about the cracked, parched plains marching northward on the same journey the trees had tried to make. The scorched bark of trees flaked and clung to their skeletal remains.
Blaze ripped a flake of bark and crushed it in his hands; a poem sought itself out in the through the mess of his electronic neurosis:

I am a refugee marching north on the wind
hoping my seed will disperse
far enough to traverse
these boundaries that will surely kill me
my roots are not fed
and there is no life left
but the wound that has bled
into the rivers
tricking down into the earth.

I could have shaded you from the sun
and thus the wind and the cold
but you let the blood run
never mind the lives slain
all for your fear of death.

Does irony feed you and quench your thirst?
When will you march with the skeletal remains of us?

And it was then that he heard the great despair taking wing into the air. The hollow cry of a humanoid who had torn her solar panel, the dying embers opened her lips, and the cry rang out through the plains of extinction.
Blaze bellowed back, and the moon’s crescent looked on, indifferent.

I don’t want to stay

If only I was a balloon
you could let go
and I could fall up
till snared by the branch of a tree
there I could hang free.

My despair has me embroiled
in so much deceit
staying alive
only for people to reach

This isn’t a life worth living
resentment is the moon
propelling the tides in my head
only sticking around
so others don’t have to think me dead
trying to die within
so I can be an animated memory
for those who claim me.

Let words fall from my lips
as empty as they may be
dead inside, but they won’t have to see

What can I say
I’m trying to stay
but how I hope something takes me away