A Book

Written for W3 

Me wife found the book 
back up nowhere, no how
on the pavement collectin’ rain 

She comes burstin’ in and says
‘I found this book back up nowhere, no how!’ 
and she slams the filthy thing down
and when she opened it
it creaked like it were an old door on rusted ‘inges
Then, with a rustle of dusty, yellowed pages, the damn thing gobbled ‘er up! 

I was mortified! Then I ‘eard us a voice in me ear from memory
‘I’d love to lose mesen in a book!’ 
And I thought, ‘Damn it! You always were so bloody literal!’ 

25 thoughts on “A Book”

  1. Kim Whysall-Hammond's avatar Kim Whysall-Hammond Oct 15, 2026 / 6:08 pm

    Ooo – I love this take on the prompt. Loved the use of vernacular, the pace of it and the laugh. Brilliant!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Matt's avatar Matt Oct 16, 2026 / 10:21 am

      Thanks for the high praise!

      Like

  2. Sally's avatar Sally Oct 15, 2026 / 7:43 pm

    Haha — great ending! I love the way I can hear the characters talking too.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Matt's avatar Matt Oct 16, 2026 / 10:22 am

      Thanks! One of my faverouite things is writing characters, so I’m pleased you can hear them

      Like

  3. brazannemuse's avatar brazannemuse Oct 16, 2026 / 3:23 pm

    This is great Matt, love the dark humour, the characters came to life, or maybe fed my imagination 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Alexinor Arcane's avatar Alexinor Arcane Oct 16, 2026 / 4:04 pm

    The creaking book swallowing your wife whole had me laughing, and that final line about her always being so literal is pure genius. I could hear every voice in that wonderful vernacular. 🌹

    Liked by 1 person

    • Matt's avatar Matt Oct 16, 2026 / 5:49 pm

      Thanks! ‘Pure genius’ is high praise. Forgive me i’m not good at knowing how to respond to such compliments. Lol

      Like

  5. sgeoil's avatar sgeoil Oct 18, 2026 / 3:31 pm

    What a great story, and that last line is perfection!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. paeansunplugged's avatar paeansunplugged Oct 18, 2026 / 7:01 pm

    Omg! Am I allowed to chuckle! What a fun, dark tale! I thoroughly enjoyed it. Thanks for joining in..

    Liked by 1 person

  7. ben Alexander's avatar ben Alexander Oct 19, 2026 / 10:50 am

    Matt, I love how you took “lose yourself in a book” so wildly literally… The book gobbling up his wife is hilarious, but her own words coming back to haunt him makes the punchline even better!

    ~David

    Liked by 1 person

  8. artiecamenzind's avatar artiecamenzind Oct 23, 2026 / 9:32 pm

    Har! good’un!

    Like

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